Stop Evolving

A teacher in India once said to me that the yogic path is not one of evolution but devolution. That we are not working to become more complex but more simple.

In devolving, we are not working on ourselves to be more, know more, think more, or do more, but to become truer to our simplest self.  We are already whole and unbroken and completely worthy in every way for just being.

The work is shedding everything that is not us, down to our simplest self. Everything we have added trying to be worthy obscures us from ourselves and others.  But, the simpler we get, the more source speaks to us. Life gets easier. We become more loving and more loved. Not because we got it right, but because we didn’t need anything extra, because who we are is inherently worthy, loving and loveable.

In simplicity there is little to plan or figure out, by being able to get quiet, do less, to wait and listen, we will have everything we need to know and do.  Getting simple opens the doors to everything you already have, which is more than you will ever need or even yet realize.

Self-Care

I was teaching at the Mountain Experience and someone asked me about how they could learn to be better at self-care.  I was in a feisty mood as a teacher that day and I said, “everything you do is self-care.” There was a bit of a stunned silence.

It is true.  There is nothing you do that is not the most self-interested thing you can think of at any moment, even when you are giving yourself away, on some level you think it is in your best interest.

However, as we learn to live at altitude and recognize the levels of consciousness, we can see that by raising our level of participation, our understanding of what self-care is changes and becomes more rewarding.

If you decided to believe that your every action was self-care, 100% of the time, how would that change what you decided to do?  How would that change how you perceived your level of fulfillment and satisfaction with life? How would you stay a victim of anything?

The Big 5 of a Better Life

Awareness
Is simply noticing things, it is what we choose to bring our attention and
consciousness to. You have the power to choose what you become aware of
and what you give your attention to. This is one of your most powerful allies
in how you experience, evolve and construct your life.

Perspective
The filters through which our consciousness sees the world, how you are
interpreting what you are aware of. Perspective limits and can modify your
awareness. Getting new, more expansive perspectives will powerfully
upgrade what you can do with your awareness and how you are able to
participate in your life.

Consciousness
Is the active part of ourselves, what we are present to, what we call agency;
our power to choose and act in alignment with our most authentic self.
Conscious behavior is in contrast to unconscious behavior. As we grow our
consciousness, conscious behavior takes over more of our lives and
unconscious behaviors are diminished, we feel more empowered and alive.

Feedback
Is information that comes in from the outside as a result of our conscious and
unconscious behaviors. By bringing awareness to the feedback we are
receiving we get a mirror to the impact of our behavior and have the
opportunity to change conscious behavior, grow and change our perspective,
and possibly bring unconscious behavior to light.

Inquiry
Is a tool for working with feedback and exploring our own awareness,
perspective, and consciousness. It is also a way to explore relationships and
interactions with others without interference from our own perspective.
Inquiry can be a method for supporting others to become aware of their own
unconscious behaviors, beliefs, and perspectives. Inquiry brings light into
unexplored places.

Be

Be
Ready to be humbled
If you wish to grow
The capacity for love
And a heart that will be
Of service to life

Be
Ready to be humbled
If you wish to have
Friends who are true
And see you for who you are

Be
Ready to be humbled
If you wish to learn
More than you know

Be
Ready to be humbled
If you wish to know truth

Be
Ready to be humbled

Be

Poem by Kyle Mercer

Experiencing Your Feelings

Fear, hurt, sadness, anger…none of these feelings are so bad if we are willing to just experience them without judgment. You may find that simply by experiencing your feelings they suddenly have less power or importance. You may also find that they are actually giving you important information that you might miss if you ignore them. Start to become more comfortable with all feelings; you have the capacity to experience them and realize they are not so bad.

Connecting with Source

One of the things that I do to touch in with source is I close my eyes and get quiet. This is a wonderful thing because the head is so quick and wants to jump in. Notice that, especially in conversation,  the head wants to jump in and fill the space. We are conditioned to fill space with talk, eating, drinking, mobile phones and  other distractions.

This is why people meditate, so they can learn to listen and create space and pay attention to sensation and the feeling of connecting with their source. Once mastered, it becomes an invitation for what is wanted. The more that we cultivate our ability to touch source the more we have this rich knowledge of what we want.

See how it feels to close your eyes and be with pause to take time to connect with your source.  Practice making space during different moments of your day. Enjoy making decisions from source rather than your mind. Watch how it opens you up to finding your truth and finding what is truly wanted.

With love,

Kyle

The Distance from Love

Recently, I have started doing yoga again. I have found an amazing weekend class with an exceptional teacher in LA. Just like the Mountain Experience, he creates an environment full of sanctuary and care with peaceful music and his calming presence. I was recently doing my practice when I started to become aware of a quality of love within myself and love for life. At the same time, I also recognized that I had a barrier from life; a separation that held me back from fully engaging with that strong love for life.

I started to become aware that the biggest aspect of this disengagement or distancing with life had to do with fear. I felt that I could not fully or would not fully engage with life because of my fear of losing love. I was scared that, if I truly let myself love life, that the inevitable loss of this love would be too much to bare. My whole life, I have been completely aware that loving is intimately tied with loss. In the past when I experienced love, I would always dread the ultimate loss that I knew would ensue. Furthermore, I started to realize that such a loss didn’t have to do just with life, but with everything: appreciation, connection with others and myself, self-acceptance, a particular experience, etc.

And, I became aware, and am now aware, of this idea that loving is also intimately tied with loss. As soon as we experience the loving, we also experience the ultimate loss, as we know that this experience is transitory and will end. Such a threat creates a hesitancy around and a distancing from loving and enjoying and engaging with the present. We as humans do not want to bear, fear or recognize the knowledge of imminent loss.

For the same reasons, some spiritual teachers encourage us not to focus on the high points of life. They explain that every peak experience will ultimately lead to an even larger loss. They say it is better to have a completely even relationship, and that the consistency will lead to you uncovering a deeper love. I have begun to understand that there is a continuity of love past death. That there is a quality of life and living that is separate from my personality and my identity. That is what these spiritual teachers are talking about. They are talking about participating in something that is more than just the “I”.

I speak about this when we talk about levels of participation. When we cross the “I/We barrier,” we start to participate in something larger than ourselves. There’s a certain quality of tapping into this universal field. The more that I identify with it, the less concerned I am about this transitory nature of love. More immature loving, which is below the “I/We barrier”, is beautiful, pleasant, exciting, and inspirational. However, the more we move into the “We,” the more we participate in and love the world.

We explore this in the Mountain Experience. We share an experience where we are not so self-conscious, where we have collective wins or losses, and where we are engaging in this larger field of love. The same thing happens when we create vulnerability during coaching sessions.

This awareness of a universal love or connection is what actually creates our loneliness. It creates awareness that there is a deeper love and experience out there that needs to be accessed. On some level, we all know it subconsciously. Despite our personal wins or successes, or our communion with friends, there is still nagging awareness that there is something more. I am starting to see that that awareness is actually positive, because it draws us forward into our consciousness.

It is innately human to believe there is something more in life. In all of us, it creates a delicate and potent suffering. However, it hopefully encourages us forward to a deeper experience of life. It is like a light in the distance that continuously pulls us towards what is possible. It engages, helps, supports, and develops a capacity and connection with what is possible and the fullness of this life experience.

We are all sharing that suffering, that love, and that path together.

Reducing Drama in Your Life

I recently started watching a little TV again, and discovered sitcoms. It has been interesting to watch that there is one basic premise that makes a sitcom work. Changing one dynamic of the sitcom would make it fall apart. Every piece of humor on a sitcom comes back to lack of communication; typically, it has to do with somebody not telling somebody else the truth, hiding, lying, or being unauthentic. A lot of that laughter is recognition of the ridiculousness of life. The reason we laugh is because we can recognize the feeling or difficulty ourselves.

I suspect if you look into most of the drama and difficulty in your life that it is created by the same dynamic. Where is the drama in your life? What communication would have helped to solve it? If you do not want your life to be a sitcom, what do you want it to be like? What kind of communication would support that?

Much love,

Kyle

Death Bed Exercise

Whether it is within your business, relationship, family, or yourself, a wonderful exercise to discover your values (not just your immediate gratification, but your true values) is to imagine that you are lying on your deathbed and you have one hour left to live. In this visualization, imagine that you are lying there and with this sense of love and peace in your heart. When you reflect on your life in this scenario, whether in terms of business, family, a relationship, or yourself, what would have to be true in that area of your life for your heart to be filled with love and satisfaction?

Once you determine what would make you feel totally satisfied with that aspect of your life, write these details down carefully and clearly. For example, imagine your business: what kind of legacy would you have had to leave in this business to leave your heart filled with love and satisfaction as you lie dying? Imagine the same for your relationship with your spouse, your child, a friend, or even yourself: what would have to be true about this relationship for you to be totally satisfied and fulfilled on your deathbed?

It is a wonderful way to make this clear. Then use last week’s exercise on Planning, and use vision, strategy and tactics to create the intention to make this true. By doing this exercise, you may find that this feeling of fulfillment and contentment may occur way before your deathbed. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to go to sleep at night with that feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction that you manifested something that was meaningful to you?

Go ahead, give it a try- what do you have to lose?

Love,

Kyle

What do you want for Christmas?

What do you want for Christmas?

 

What do you really want?

 

No, what do you really want?

 

Focus on making that part of your holiday season.

Happy Holidays make it a good one.

 

With love,

Kyle